On a whim, I decided to take the boys hiking. We live in one of the loveliest places around. When we were dating, my husband took me to a new waterfall on every hike. It was our thing. These days, our thing is cleaning up after dinner together. Life. Happens.
As I presented the idea to the boys, I realized what I was signing up for. The chosen trail is one I hiked when single and childless, 10 years ago. This mama isn't the same girl she was when she went gallivanting all over the place with love in her eyes and excitement in her heart as her future husband took her chasing waterfalls (all my 90s friends can thank me for that song reference).
As we unloaded the van, I supermanned my 32 pound (almost) 11 month old into a back carry whilst grabbing the 2 year old's hand just before he ran into the road beside where we parked.
We took our lunch (I had Subway coupons) and searched for a good place to eat. We saw no picnic tables, so we perched on a log. As we finished, I needed a quick potty break so I headed over to a tree. As I glanced around, I saw a beautiful clearing with a picnic table. I laughed and showed the boys. Amazing what you miss when you are hurrying 3 little ones about.
At the trailhead, we were all smiles.
And that is where I began to consider carefully what I had gotten myself into. Recently, I have taken up the motto, "We can do hard things,". I share it with the boys when they struggle, or even when I am struggling. Today, I did a hard thing.
I'm overweight. My doctor would say morbidly obese. I am 5 feet 4 inches and break 200 pounds. I'm out of shape despite chasing littles and eating healthy. I have some health issues that make it exceptionally challenging to lose weight and so I have chosen, for this season, to accept where I'm at.
That said, hiking while carrying a 32 lb baby on my back the entire trip, plus carrying a 35 lb two year old on the return, was a hard thing.
We still had fun. It was still worth it. We collected leaves and pinecones. We sang songs, and my boys imagined. My eldest climbed a tree and announced he was going to live in the woods forever. My two year old drew pictures on the trail and shared his stories. I saw reflections of who they are. I caught glimpses of who they will be.
Our goal was to make it to the waterfall. However, after nearly two hours of hiking, the boys were exhausted and this mama was nervous about getting back. We took a break, I nursed Benaiah. As I watched my precious baby nurse, I truly felt overwhelmed with emotion. Here I was. Mom of three hiking in the woods with her littles. Breastfeeding underneath the stunning sun and enjoying the cool Autumn air. My older boys "built fires" with their stick collections and drew pictures on the trail.
Finally, I loaded Benaiah upon my back again, looked at my drowsy older boys and announced defeat. We wouldn't make it to the waterfall today. Both older boys were upset. One cried out and began to tantrum. A couple passerby smiled and shared they were so impressed we had made it "that far" (which according to their fitbit was 2.7 miles).
Sluggishly, we made our way back to our vehicle. I carried Brave half the way. I was super tired. They were nodding off as I cranked our van. I smiled. I can do hard things. It is in me. This overweight, out of shape, getting old, mama of three hiked over 4 miles with her three boys 4 and under. It was worth it. More than worth it. My joy was renewed. A little adventure was sparked. Memories were made.
You know what? You can do hard things too. Moreso, I'd say we should do hard things. It teaches us resilience, fortitude, and how to overcome. Our children are watching. They take note of our lifestyle and our choices. I'm raising a man tribe. These sweet boys are growing speedily before my eyes. I desire that they would grow into leaders, strong, brave, and pioneering. How else will they learn these things if they do not observe them in me?
Get out there mama. Do the hard things.
